Two Dads Are Just Fine??

The statement was displayed on a digital marquee in front of a local church building. I had to slow down and look again wondering if I had read it correctly at first. (You might want to sit down for this one.) The digital message came across in two parts:
   Jesus had two dads…
   And He turned out fine.

What were they thinking!? What were they trying to say!? Were they implying that Jesus was brought up in a home with a same-sex marriage!?

I paused and wondered if I had overreacted or misunderstood at first. I began thinking of plausible explanations for making such a statement. There were none.

The fact that we are currently living in a social and religious climate of tolerance toward homosexuality and same-sex marriage cannot be overlooked. Had the message been posted at another time, perhaps it would have suggested something different, but that is not the case.

So, I wondered whether the person posting the message intended for it to be understood in the context of same-sex marriage, or if perhaps he/she was simply trying to wake people up, initiate dialogue, or use sarcasm. Though trying to give the author the benefit of the doubt, I could not think of any reason that a person would post such a message. My conclusion was that the author was, at best, naïve or, at worst, foolish or insensitive.

I checked in with my teenage daughters: “What!? That’s terrible!” and “Are you kidding me!?” were their replies. My wife made a similar reply; so also a couple of friends. They all, like me, understood the message to promote tolerance for same-sex marriage.

Without a broader context the statement is sure to be understood in light of the current social and religious climate of tolerance. So, within this context, what does the ‘two dads’ statement imply?

• Jesus grew up in a home with two dads.
• ‘Two dads’ implies a same-sex marriage.
• Growing up in a home with ‘two dads’ has no adverse affect on kids. So, same-sex marriage is OK.
• Kids brought up in a home with a same-sex marriage might even turn out like Jesus.

Do you see the gross errors in the conclusion of the original statement? Even those who are tolerant of same-sex marriages should see the idiocy in the lack of reasoning. Consider:

• God and Joseph, the implied ‘two dads,’ were not married.
• God and Joseph were not even of the same nature. (God is spirit; Joseph was human.)
• Joseph was married to a woman, Mary, not God.
• Children who have ‘turned out fine’ do not indicate ‘fine parents.’ Some ‘turn out fine’ in spite of terrible parenting or difficult circumstances.

Christians, there are many things being written and spoken about same-sex marriage and homosexual relationships. Guard yourself from foolish statements like this one that pervert the truth and pull God down to the level of sinful man. Do not be naïve about gross misapplications of biblical truth by words that are cleverly pieced together in order to suggest contrived conclusions. The ‘two dads’ statement is misleading, to say the least. Not only do such statements fly in the face of common sense, they can draw you away from Jesus by confusing you with clever words. 

Be alert!

Mark Stinnett

May 3, 2026

Second Things First

To some extent, our society loves the second great command of Jesus.

There is a tremendous push in our society for tolerance. In one sense, that is admirable. We need to be tolerant of the preferences of others, the opinions of others, the weaknesses of others, and so on. Tolerance seems to embrace the idea of love.

And yet, tolerance in our society isn’t what it seems. All too often, tolerance is more accurately: “You need to be tolerant of me.”

When tolerance becomes “You, tolerate me,” then I am embracing me, not love. That is what happens when you put second things first.

When the second great command is placed ahead of the first…

• Man is glorified.
• Man is central.
• Man becomes like...man.
• Man is the motivation.

However, when we keep first things first, the first and greatest command is given priority:

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength. 

—Mark 12:30

When we put first things first…

• God is glorified.
• God is central.
• Man becomes like...God!
• God is the motivation for all that we do.

Do you remember the teaching of Jesus…?

Whoever forces you to go one mile, go with him two. 

—Matthew 5:41

This teaching, from the Sermon on the Mount, acknowledged that a Roman soldier could force a person to carry his load for a mile. Naturally, that was distasteful to a Jew. The Jewish teachers taught that a disciple of the law should not be pressed into service by the king’s soldiers. Jesus, however, taught people to have a different frame of mind. Voluntarily go another mile.

Now, thinking of that teaching, how absurd would it be for a person to volunteer to a Roman soldier, “Hey, I’d be happy to carry your things a second mile.” That kind of thinking is laughable. A person cannot possibly go the second mile until after going the first.

In a similar way, how absurd is it to think that there is benefit in following the second great command without first observing the first great command? In fact, it is impossible to truly love your neighbor as yourself if God is not first in your life.

“For God so loved the world…” is not about how much God loved, but about the way in which God loved. God’s love is sacrificial; He gave His only begotten Son.

When a person loves God first, they embrace that same kind of sacrificial love and extend it outward to others. Tolerance then becomes exactly what it sounds like, “I will be tolerant of you by sacrificing for your good.”

Tolerance must never sacrifice the holiness and purity of God. Tolerance must never embrace sin. God’s tolerance does not embrace every thought and every lifestyle because not every thought and lifestyle glorifies God.

God loved sacrificially, but He did not cease to be God. We are to love our neighbor, but not without first devoting ourselves to God in love.

Keep first things first! Then, and only then, will the second have relevance.

Mark Stinnett

October 6, 2024

Discipline Isn't a Warm Fuzzy

Whether it is the discipline of a child, self-discipline, or even church discipline, it is not supposed to be fun. Discipline is not a warm fuzzy. And yet, in our day tolerance is king and we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.

I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. I prefer to be tolerant. I was never excited about disciplining my own children. I never relished the thought of the next discipline event. Sometimes the discipline of my children was also painful to my wife and me. And yet…

Near the end of the book of Hebrews is an illuminating passage about discipline (12:4-11). Discipline in the home is used as an illustration to help us understand God’s discipline. Read that passage and then consider these observations.

We respect our earthly fathers for disciplining us (v. 9). Not everyone has had parents who disciplined in a good, constructive way. Television documentaries on ‘corporal punishment’ have consistently highlighted parents who were harsh, short-tempered, and who publicly humiliated their children. I think I know why we never saw good examples of discipline in the home in the documentaries. Discipline is intimate. In other words, it is a personal and private matter. Parents must not discipline in anger and must discipline in a way that fits the offense. They must ensure understanding before the disciplinary action is carried out. And they must show their love and acceptance afterward. That is part of the reason that we respect our fathers for disciplining us.

Discipline is to be expected because it is for good. Solomon has many things to say about discipline in the book of Proverbs. Many people reject his teachings because of his strong wording. However, the simple point is that proper discipline demonstrates love. The absence of discipline is a sign of the absence of love.

Discipline is not joyful in the moment, and that is true of every kind of discipline. Yet it has a purpose of making a person better. Of spiritual discipline God says that…

He disciplines us for our good, so that we may share His holiness (v. 10).

To those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness (v. 11).

In Peter’s list of Christian attributes are self-control and endurance (2 Peter 1:6). Self-control is the discipline of stopping. Stop talking to avoid gossip. Stop listening to avoid being a busybody. Stop anger before it becomes sin. Stop looking to avoid lust. Stop longing to avoid covetousness. In general, we need to stop before we give in to temptation and sin. Discipline is the opposite of temptation (James 1:14).

Endurance is the discipline of continuing. It is forgiving yet again, serving when you are tired, loving the unlovable. It is enduring the trials of life. It is doing good and continuing in righteousness when there seems to be no positive result and those around you prosper in sin.

Discipline is rooted in faith and hope. It is faith in God’s word realizing that you are not missing out on anything of significance when you do not possess all the things you wish or participate in all the activities you like. It is steadfastness when there is nothing in the present to validate your faith. Discipline makes sense when you keep your focus on the future promises of God.

Discipline yourself (and your children) so God doesn’t have to. 

Don’t give in to the fuzzy illusion of tolerance.

Mark Stinnett

January 7, 2024

How Do You Teach a Child Mercy?

We live at a time when the tolerance of ideas different from your own is promoted. Along with that is the tolerance of behaviors, values and beliefs that are different from your own. I remember a time when I personally benefitted from a tolerant boss. My mistake cost our organization several hundred dollars, but my boss did not make me pay for my mistake.

This has all made me think about mercy in the Bible. Is mercy the same as tolerance?

I found out that it is not. In the Bible we see God’s mercy when something wrong was done. For justice to be served, there should be consequences. Yet, mercy is shown when the person does not have to bear the consequences. He does not receive the justice he deserves.

When I made my costly mistake, a natural consequence might have been repayment, suspension or termination. My boss showed mercy by not making me pay the consequences.

So, how was that different from tolerance? Well, actually it was tolerant, but there was more. My boss had a conversation with me about my mistake and how I could avoid the same mistake in the future. In other words, the mistake was a real mistake. It mattered. There were real consequences, but I was personally shown mercy by not having to pay the consequences.

By itself, tolerance is not mercy. Tolerance ignores justice saying, “I accept you, stay as you are.” Tolerance is about acceptance. Mercy is about justice.

Children often misunderstand justice. When they do something wrong and need discipline, they interpret the discipline in terms of acceptance. A parent removes a privilege or introduces something unpleasant as discipline. Then the child thinks he is not accepted and not loved.

Parents must understand the difference between tolerance and mercy; the difference between acceptance and justice. When we turn to Scripture we never see God tolerating sin. He has been tolerant of mankind, but ultimately justice will be served. (Hebrews 10:30)

Some people would say that God’s justice is intolerant. The really crazy thing is that God’s demand for justice for mankind was shown through His love for mankind. Every person has sinned against God which has resulted in a sin-debt. Yet, God loved us so much that he volunteered to pay our sin-debt for us by sacrificing His own Son. That was justice and mercy in the same sacrificial act. So, justice was served through a loving act of mercy.

Teach a child tolerance by ignoring wrongdoing, or by making excuses for them when they have wronged another person. Let them think that doing wrong does not matter or that there is no real right and wrong. (I accept you. Stay as you are.)

Teach a child mercy by first being consistent in discipline. Teach a standard of right and wrong and based on the character of God. (Check out Exodus 34:6-7.) Mercy is shown when you choose to not apply consequences after a wrong has been done. However, mercy is taught only if the child is truly sorry for their wrong and if you communicate carefully that the wrong is still wrong. Your child must be old enough to understand the concepts of justice, consequences and sorrow (even if those are not the words they might choose). You teach mercy best when you are the one your child has hurt by doing wrong.

You can teach mercy only if you have learned to show mercy and not just tolerance.

Mercy instills the heart of God;

but tolerance alone, the heart of Satan.

Mark Stinnett

December 20, 2020

Did Jesus Ever Judge?

A woman who had committed adultery was brought to Jesus. Her accusers were trying to trap Jesus. The sentence under the Law of Moses was stoning. What would Jesus do? He openly said that he did not judge her. (John 8)

There is a terrible misunderstanding in our culture regarding ‘judgment.’ The example above is often used to rebuke Christians who appeal to the Scriptures regarding the immoral behaviors and lifestyles of many in our society. Unfortunately, the passage is misused. Jesus did not justify sin just because he did not judge her.

The problem is tricky, partly because of the broad usage of the term ‘judge’ in the New Testament. The core meaning of the Greek term for ‘judge’ was: to separate. It was the idea of distinguishing between things. It could even describe the activity of organizing things (e.g. separating forks, knives and spoons in your silverware drawer—judging your silverware; a little silly, but accurate). Of course we are more accustomed to thinking in terms of legal or moral judgment, that is, distinguishing between legal and illegal, or between moral good and evil.

I think people are easily offended in our society. So, the banner cries of “Tolerance” and “You can’t judge me” are often used to squelch descriptions of behaviors and lifestyles described in the Bible as immoral, evil or ungodly. That’s right, the Bible does make distinctions, not for the purpose of devaluing people, but for the purpose of instruction. That is the only way people will understand how to make a proper response to God in their lives. Now, consider a few verses from the Bible…

For God did not send the Son (Jesus) into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him.
—John 3:17

For not even the Father (God) judges anyone, but He has given all judgment to the Son (Jesus)…. 
—John 5:22

He who rejects Me (Jesus) and does not receive My sayings, has one who judges him; the word I spoke is what will judge him at the last day. 
—John 12:48

So Christ also, having been offered once to bear the sins of many, will appear a second time for salvation without reference to sin, to those who eagerly await Him.
—Hebrews 9:28

What does it all mean?

Jesus was first sent to deal with man’s sin problem by offering Himself as a sacrifice in place of sinners. (God demands payment for sin.) Yet, every person must make a response to this incredible gift...

He who hears My (Jesus) word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgment, but has passed out of death into life. 
—John 5:24

A person who does not make a proper faith response to Jesus WILL be judged, specifically by the words of Jesus. So, when Jesus returns, He will not come “in reference to sin,” that is, to deal with the sin problem of mankind. Rather, He will judge (distinguish/separate) between those who have made a proper faith response to Him and those who have not.

As for the adulterous woman that Jesus encountered (John 8); Jesus explicitly told her, “Go and sin no more.” So, while he did not judge (condemn) her at that moment, he most certainly distinguished her behavior as sinful and unacceptable to God. Then, from that point forward she had to decide whether she would follow Jesus or continue her lifestyle of sin and in the end be judged by the words of Jesus.

Mark Stinnett

Listen, but Do Not Follow (No. 2)

Jesus told his disciples one of the oddest thing I have ever read.

“Therefore pay attention to what they tell you and do it. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they teach.” 
—Matthew 23:3 (The NET Bible)

That’s how I feel when I hear some of the voices of our day.

One of the banner cries of our current society is, “Tolerance.” Did you know that tolerance is taught in the Bible? It is an attribute of love. Let me explain:

The Apostle Paul instructed Christians:

Now we who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and not just please ourselves. Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification. 
—Romans 15:1-2 (NASB95)

The simple point is that Christians are at different levels of maturity in their faith. Each one should bear with (tolerate) those who are weaker. More specifically, the word ‘bear’ means to 'help carry the load.' Our task is to help, not just tolerate. (See also Galatians 6:12.)

What about our relationship to those who are not Christians?

If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men. 
—Romans 12:18

Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. 
—Philippians 4:5

These two verses encourage Christians to treat ALL people, Christians and non-Christians with a spirit of gentleness and with the goal of peace. That certainly involves a tolerant attitude. More specifically, aggressive attitudes that promote anger and encourage verbal or physical combat are not a part of the Christian life.

However…

• Jesus condemned anger (and murder); lust (and adultery); mistreatment of wives; deceit; personal vengeance; and hate (Matthew 5). 
• Jesus condemned hypocrisy (Matthew 6 & 23). 
• Jesus told the woman who had been publicly humiliated for her adultery to stop sinning (John 8). 
• The Apostle Paul rebuked the Christians in Corinth for tolerating an immoral man (1 Corinthians 5). 

Jesus and the New Testament writers clearly stood for love of mankind by promoting: peace, help for the needy, justice for all people, etc. Yet, they also stood strongly for the love of God through lives devoted to God in holiness, godly (God-like) behavior, and moral purity as defined by God. Jesus and His disciples never taught the tolerance of sin, as if to say, ”Let’s just close our eyes to sin, and it will be alright.”

What is all this about???

There are many voices of our day crying, “Tolerance,” claiming that they are echoing the teaching of Jesus. Some who advocate today’s tolerance teaching misapply the love of Jesus to the point that wrong is right, moral impurity is good, and a stance against sin is considered bad or hateful. There are some who use ‘tolerance’ to defend their own personal moral choices and lifestyle which are condemned in Scripture. Then, when someone points out the simple teaching of the Bible, they spew the venom of intolerance and cry out, “You can’t judge me!”

Things can get really confusing, unless...

When people speak the truth I can listen, but I will only follow Jesus. How can I discern truth?

My Bible is completely open...is yours?

Mark Stinnett

Something Necessary for Today

Before you read any further, you should know that this article will contain some strong language. It is not my intention to offend, but I will take the risk...

The sensitivity of people in our nation is at an all-time high. (The way you interpret the word 'sensitivity' might be positive or negative.)

I saw an ad posted on social media recently after which several 'comments' were posted. The comments offered testimonials for the product. Then followed a comment accusing those posting the testimonials of being paid for their endorsement. Following the accusation were dozens of comments agreeing and disagreeing with the accusation, and accusing the accuser of a judgmental and intolerant attitude. Sound familiar?

"Tolerance" has become the banner cry of our nation's younger generation. It's companion: "Don't judge me!"

Who would disagree? Tolerance seems to support 'peace on earth' and that would be a really good thing. Likewise, to rid society of judgmental and prejudicial attitudes would make life so much better. This kind of thinking seems to promote love and harmony. However...

I've noticed something, perhaps you have too. Our society's cry for tolerance masks a deep-seated problem that is self-defeating. Too many people apply tolerance reflexively. In other words, they apply it to themselves wanting everyone to tolerate them so that they can enjoy a life with no restraints. They are fools!

I have taken the word fool from the Proverbs in the Bible. By definition the fool lacks good sense in the social, moral and practical areas of life. Tolerance thinking cannot be sustained the way our society preaches. A lack of personal restraint is sure to lead to anarchy (chaos where no one rules). I do not need to cite studies; common sense will do.

A lack of self-restraint is unhealthy for government, society, church, family and even the individual. The answer...discipline. (I warned you.)

A whip is for the horse, a bridle for the donkey,
And a rod for the back of fools.
--Proverbs 26:3

The whip is used to make a horse do what the horse is meant to do. A bridle is used to make a donkey do what the donkey is meant to do. The horse, left on its own is wild and relatively useless; so also the donkey.

Left on his own (with no restraint), the fool is like a wild animal, relatively useless. For the fool to do what is worthwhile and right, a rod is necessary. 

Though a literal rod was used in Solomon’s day, it symbolically represents any measure of appropriate strong discipline.

The fact that the whip works for the horse, and the fact that the bridle works for the donkey should tells us with great clarity that strong discipline will work in the case of the fool.

The rod is not about punishment but rather, discipline.

• The rod of discipline has a purpose.
• The rod of discipline is not pleasant.
• The rod of discipline works.
• The rod of discipline is necessary.
  

Tolerance sounds nice, but it just won't work!

Christians, self-discipline is necessary so that 'rod' will not be necessary.
Parents, the 'rod' is necessary for your children.

Hate Evil?

The fear of the LORD is to hate evil; 
Pride and arrogance and the evil way, 
And the perverted mouth, I hate.
                                                     --Proverbs 8:13

Tolerance! is the order of the day. In fact, our society tolerates just about anything, anyone, and any thought . . . except intolerance!!!

Most people assume that the soul of a person and the actions of a person are a 'single package' when it comes to acceptance. If you accept me, you must therefore accept what I do. If you do not accept what I do, you must not accept me.

Jesus stood out like a sore thumb and showed the right way.

When the Jewish leaders dragged a woman in front of Jesus and accused her of adultery, they demanded that he judge her according to the Law of Moses. Jesus made the most remarkable stand. He condemned the Jews for their arrogant judgment because they were also sinners. He then told the woman that he would not stand in judgment of her; but there is one thing more. Jesus instructed the woman to go her way “and sin no more.” He accepted the woman, but did not tolerate her sin!
(Read the entire encounter in John 8:1-11.)

He condemned those who judged.
He refused to judge.
He accepted the sinner.
He did not tolerate sin.

God does not tolerate sin.

Isn't that the beauty of the sacrifice of Jesus?
It expresses God’s love for the souls of men and, at the same time, his intolerance for sin. (If he tolerated sin, then why the sacrifice?!)

God hates evil.
Do you stand in awe of God?
Do you fear the Lord?
Do you hate evil?