Rethink 'Wink'

It was springtime during my sixth grade year. After considerable thought and planning I did it. I winked at the cute little dark-haired girl in my class!

Years later I learned that it was called non-verbal communication. I had no idea that I was capable of such sophistication! The ‘wink’ in sixth grade meant, “I like you.” The thing that was so confusing later on was that I had been winked at by adults and “I like you” just didn’t always make sense. So, using my kid-powered deductive reasoning skills I decided that winking was some kind of code, but I had no idea what it meant.

As a teen, I saw the wink again. An uncle of mine was playing a harmless prank on one of my younger cousins. That time I understood the wink, “Don’t say anything; play along.”

We all had a big laugh afterward.

I finally understood: The wink communicates when the mouth is closed. The wink can also communicate when the mouth speaks. Solomon observed that the wink may tell the truth while the mouth tells a lie.

A worthless person, a wicked man, 
    Is the one who walks with a false mouth,
Who winks with his eyes, who signals with his feet, 
    Who points with his fingers;
Who with perversity in his heart devises evil continually, 
    Who spreads strife.
                                                --Proverbs 6:12-14

A person says one thing with his mouth, but he communicates a different message by non-verbal signals; a wink, shuffling of the feet, pointing the fingers. God has an opinion about that individual:

     Worthless.

     Wicked.

     Liar.

Solomon did not condemn non-verbal communication. The "I like you" wink is innocent. A head-nod, motion of the hand, and the “stink eye” are often effective means of communication used by parents and teachers. Solomon warned against using deceptive signals to cover a lie. He described a subtle and evil manipulation that ultimately causes strife. Don’t think this is just for kids. God hates the “one who spread strife among his brothers.” (v. 19)

In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus instructed his followers to say, “Yes,” if they mean “Yes,” and to say, “No,” if they mean “No” (Matthew 5:37). In other words, speak the truth or say nothing at all; no verbal manipulation; no deceit; no lying; and no subtle silent signals.

Tell the truth.
(No Wink.)