The Law of Forgiveness

“The Bible commands us to forgive, but that doesn’t mean that I will forget.”

There are so many things wrong with that statement it is difficult to know where to start. Let’s just say that anyone making that kind of statement does not really understand forgiveness.

Have you ever asked one of these questions about forgiveness?

• When must I forgive a person?
• Under what circumstances must I forgive?
• Must I forgive a person who is not sorrowful?
• Must I forgive a person who does not repent?
• Must I forgive a person who commits the same sin over and over?

The Jews believed that a person did not have to forgive after three times. Peter was undoubtedly aware of this when he asked Jesus if a person should forgive up to seven times. (He probably thought he was being generous with his limitation.)

Jesus used a parable in to explain forgiveness (Matthew 18). There are a number of elements present in the parable; law was not one of them. In other words, forgiveness is not about obedience to law, any law.

One key element involved in forgiveness is debt. A person who has no debt (or sin debt) has no need of forgiveness. A person who is not indebted to me cannot be forgiven by me; they owe me nothing.

If an official releases a prisoner before his debt to society is paid, it is called a pardon, not forgiveness. The (crime) debt goes unpaid and justice is not served.

Forgiveness is about justice with regard to debt payment, but the payment is actually made by the one who is owed the debt. In Jesus’ parable, a servant owed his master a tremendous debt that he could not possibly repay. The master released the servant from his obligation. But we must recognize that the master never received his money. So, he is the one who paid the debt by absorbing the debt that was owed him.

There are three other elements present. 

• The master had compassion on his servant: mercy. 
• By taking responsibility for the servant’s debt, the master basically gifted the servant the full amount: grace. 
• By his actions, the master restored the relationship between himself and his servant so that there was no longer any indebtedness: love.

Withholding the penalty for indebtedness is mercy. Paying the debt is grace. And preserving the relationship is love. So, ultimately, in forgiveness justice is served and the relationship preserved. Mercy, grace, love and justice are all attributes of God.

Then the Lord passed by in front of him (Moses) and proclaimed, "The Lord, the Lord God, compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in lovingkindness and truth; who keeps lovingkindness for thousands, who forgives iniquity, transgression and sin; yet He will by no means leave the guilty unpunished, visiting the iniquity of fathers on the children and on the grandchildren to the third and fourth generations.

--Exodus 34:6-7

When a person commits a wrong against me personally, then questions of forgiveness arise. The questions are not: When? Whether? How often? How many times? Those are all legal questions from a heart that holds on to the hurt while demanding justice for the other person: An eye-for-an-eye kind of justice.

Forgiveness is motivated by love because love is more concerned with relationships than with equity in justice. Love is merciful to release the offender from his debt against me. Love is gracious to shoulder the hurt, accept the pain and embarrassment, and pay the expense for the wrong done against me.

Love sets emotion aside. You are more important than I. The preservation of our relationship is more important than I. That’s why the law of forgiveness is love; and there are no boundaries. At least, that’s what Jesus did.

Mark Stinnett

December 18, 2022