I Probably Shouldn’t Tell You This, But . . .

You’ve heard it, perhaps you’ve said it yourself: “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but . . . .”

The person who begins a sentence with this phrase usually glances quickly to the left, then to the right. (They must be checking to see if anyone might “see” what they are about to say.) It is an obvious signal that they want to conceal what they are about to do. They don’t want to get caught...because...there is no ‘probably’ about it. They should not tell, and they know it.

However, the abundance of listening ears tempts the whisperer. So, the whisperer tells things that should not be told.

It really doesn’t matter who already knows. It doesn’t matter that names aren’t used. It doesn’t matter that the listener is considered a friend or thought to be trustworthy. Both the whisperer and the one who listens to the whisperer are guilty of gossip.

___________

Have you ever watched a bully on a playground? He is quite different than the whisperer. He struts around as if untouchable. He barges ahead without watching where he is going. He puffs out his chest and threatens others. He usually starts his fight with words, but he really wants to use his fists.

The actions of the bully are unacceptable, but at least he is honest and open with his intentions...not the whisperer.

Regardless of her intentions the whisperer causes strife and contention among others, just like the bully. Yet, her approach is subtle. Off to the side, over in a corner, by phone, over mid-morning coffee, she masks her gossip with quiet whispers.

   For lack of wood the fire goes out, 
   And where there is no whisperer, contention quiets down.
   --Proverbs 26:20

Do you know how to deal with a whisperer?

When you hear the signal, “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but...” interrupt!

Rudely interrupt with kind agreement, “You are so right!”

The fire goes out...
Enough said.